No matter how he looks into my eyes, no matter how I daydream about his embrace, his kisses, I have to keep in mind that everything is going to destroy me little by little. I'm doing the best to make myself happy. Not to sit down in the dark and cry. Cry...oh! I did that last night while driving back home. I haven't done that since Mr P.
Like Gigi, in HJNTIY, I'm getting a hold of my life. Not only I'm loosing weight, I'm paying my bills on time and everyday I make the effort to get out of the house looking good. I always say that I don't regret what I do but for the first time I'm thinking it twice. I acted as if it was right for me but wrong for others. He said he felt closer to me. Funny...I feel like a total stranger. I promised myself that it was the last time I'll hurt myself like that. Don't be mad at him, it was also my fault.
It could have been a beautiful thing but at the end he's just not that into me.
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